It's Lady's job to say which ones should die and NAME them,but I'm merely

complaining, not pointing fingers.

All Mary Sues have traumatic childhoods or no recollection of their childhood.

This means that the author doesn't want to bother with it or has writer's

block.

There are three types of Mary Sues. They vary in name, look, rank, and

occupation, but they all have the same personality.

Mary Sue dies in the arms of one true love

or she marries them.

Her one true love ends up killing the person they were originally paired with

in the series.

Usually. Or they become best friends with the person that their one true love

was paired with in the series.

But I'm getting away with myself. Mary Sue, Type 1: Everyone loves this Mary

Sue. She has looks, brains, and a sweet disposition.

People can't stop killing themselves over her. They also can't seem to stop

saving her from imminent danger. She tends to be an engineer, a scientist, or a

doctor. A non- threatening, helpful job.

When the hero wakes up, she's nearby, cooking soup, pulling out bandages, or by

the bed, wiping the sweat off their tired brow. She is of course, flawless.

Mary Sue, Type 2: She's beautiful. She's powerful. She's got the looks, the

pretty face, the intelligence to blow someone off their butt,

and she's P-E-R-F-E-C-T!

She also can't seem to stop sleeping with people, discarding romances, breaking

people up with no concern or feeling, and starting foundations in the memory of

their long, lost, *dead* love.

This Mary Sue also believes that all the guys in the world are straight. No man

that's attractive in the girl's life is gay.

They also can't keep their hands off her. They never have girlfriends and are

always, always, always available JUST FOR HER. She also tends to break up life

long friendships because she's just soooo beautiful that everyone has to have

her. Mary Sue, Type 2 also tends to be best friends with the people that would,

in any normal situation kill her.

Mary Sue, Type 3: HELP!!!!! Damsel in distress, big time here. Mary Sue Type 1

can save herself from most situations, the bigger ones require help. Mary Sue

Type 3 cries when she breaks a nail. She cries if she's pregnant, or if she's

not. She weeps if the test has two blue lines and she can't decipher which one

means yes or no. She bawls when the drug store closes on Sunday. She blubbers

when her true love has to go out of town for a few days on business. Type 3 is a

Cinderella story. She is very talented and beautiful but doesn't know it. She

meets a sexy, influential man who helps her with her problems and makes her

realize how special she really, really is. No one knows why. Or she gets adopted

by extremely wealthy, powerful people with connections. Once again, no one knows

why. They just do it. For no reason. Scary.

My Favorite Mary Sue Story Excerpts...

Removed in fear of authors. Especially Black Sylke...I quiver to cogitate of what

she'd do if she found that *beautiful* excerpt about

Lady Une slapping (Black Sylke...ooooohhhhh, special. I love it when Lady Une slaps

anyone...

anyway, Sylke's entitled to her opinion and I respect her right to have an

opinion, plus she's older and probably wiser than me too.

I just think that Treize and Lady Une

are "soul mates"...but enough cheesiness......